He is a God of process

Sitting at the extreme right on the first row of the bus, was a lady with 3 kids as the 4th passenger on where was clearly supposed to sit just 3 people. The youngest child started crying as the bus was too hot, the continuous cry filled the almost silent bus.

"Give the baby what she wants or she won't stop crying" a man's voice from the back rang loudly. The mother ignored while trying to pat the baby on the back to shut her up but this baby wasn't having any of that, she cried even louder.

The male voice from behind said the same thing again but this time another woman echoed his thoughts in agreement, The mother then did the needful and the baby of course kept quiet.

As if to rub it in the mother's face "You see, she is now quiet. They don't want to know where you are, what they want is what they want that's how babies are" said the voice from behind

That struck a chord in me.

We are babies when we start this walk with God.
New world...
No knowledge...
Need guidance
Need growth...

In a way babies are 'spoilt' and as they grow parents start instilling the required discipline in them 'Kneel down to greet your elders' 
'No! you can't have biscuit at 11:00pm... You shouldn't even be awake at this time c'mon go to bed' and this is just earthly parents out of the Love that they have for them, put their children in check as they grow older.

How much more our heavenly father? When we are babies in Christ and we 'fuss'/'cry' going all give-me-give-me on GOD most of the time we get, but as our understanding grows by beholding him in a mirror we would be expected to start displaying it in our maturity in Christ.

Growth in Christ is a conscious decision that the individual makes, it says as we behold (2 cor 3:18)... It then means it's our responsibility to look in the direction and the comforting part is that no one is expecting us to be 6 months old babies today and 5 years old tomorrow...

Even God acknowledges process... We will be transformed from glory to glory. The question is are we looking in HIS direction?

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Dear 18-year-old-me

Hey Girl,

I see you just turned 18 and I know you are uber-excited. Mummy Bankole will call you today and tell you these words ''You're 18 now, you've become responsible'' and she means it but something she missed out is  responsibility is not imputed to you because of your age, you have to learn to be it. Don't brush it off, own it and learn to be responsible.

Look at you all innocent, Its cute and all but I need you to quit being innocent this has gotten you in trouble and from the look of things will get you into more trouble. I'm not trying to be hard on you, let me explain what I mean. I know you are intelligent, but I need you to be sharp and stop being oblivious and really take responsibilty for your life. Not everyone has your best intentions at heart. Stop assuming everyone does.

In the same light(but may sound contradictory) do not lose your trust in people, balance is key. Balance it out. Wisdom is profitable to direct.
I know right now you are battling with low self esteem because nobody exactly believes in you but let me tell you one thing you are smart and in about a year from now you will have every reason to doubt what you've believed about yourself for most of your teenage years. Its not going to be an easy phase for you but you need to start believing in yourself for yourself. Get ready.

I know you hold alot of resentment against your parents right now for not believing in you, for sending you to that school without their proper research about it and the other little things that lead you here but I promise it will get better, you will get better. Forgive. Really Forgive, because you are just hurting yourself by holding that much toxic stuff inside and its beginning to make you bitter. Let it go because when you finally do some years from now, you will wonder why you didn't earlier.

Do.not.date.boys. DONT! and shun those ones that don't even what to define what they want from you, really. This piece of advice is not for now, keep it in your left palm you will need it in a few years. Trust me.

I know you go to church on Sunday and you believe in Jesus but I need you to stop being lukwarm about it, its more that what mummy says or what you should do to not go to hell, God wants a relationship with you. God shouldn't be a part of your life, your life should be centred around him and your life will be better for it, contrary to what you think right now the 'SU' is not an extreme, its the life. little hint, You will live like one soon! oh yes, without earring and trousers.

I see you forbidding it. Lol. best believe girl!

Finally, I love you very much. These are some of the things I wish you knew about in this phase of your life but I am grateful. Grateful for you, grateful to you for who I am now. Thank you for being too innocent to a fault, Thank you for all your flaws, thank you for the ignorant mistakes you made and thank you for being focused and firm with your dreams.

Every step, every misstep, every decision you made and the ones you didn't make led me here. Exactly where God has me today. Thank you.

Thank God.
Cheers to the future!

24!

Ever think of writing a letter to your old self? What advice will you give your younger self?
***

Have you come to an end of yourself? Have you come to a point where nothing else seems to be working out and you've tried all you could? Click to meet GRACE

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Opinion: Is it lack of faith to not put all your eggs in one basket?

Based on the common saying ¨I cannot put my eggs in one basket¨ Sope hit me with a question ¨Is not putting your eggs in one basket wisdom or an act of not enough faith?¨

In order for me to understand he gave me examples.
1. Is it an act of foolishness to take drugs or is it lack of faith?
2. Is it wisdom after praying about wanting to do masters to also start applying for Jobs?

Wisdom or Lack of faith?

Having said that, there are babes in Christ and there are matured Christians and that will tell in your approach to things. When someone is still a babe and coming into a deeper knowledge of God and his ways - but is not exactly there yet.

I think its totally fine when people do things without faith and the word even warns us not to judge such people. Even Jesus repeated ¨Your faith has made you whole¨

We are under the new covenant and there are no rules set in stone for us.

You might say the same Bible say to have faith and not of works and it also says faith without works is dead.

In the new covenant God deal with us uniquely and gives us instructions tailored to our lives. When he speaks to us as his children and gives us instructions to follow and that is the work our faith works. It is birth out of obedience to the word/instructions of God.

As opposed to just applying for school and looking for different Jobs, because thats the next logical steps in the world that we live in, God instructs you to apply for just school, now you are confident because God said you should. The wisdom is in obedience'to his instructions.

Also, If someone is diagnosed with cancer and as opposed to going to the hospital which is the logical thing to do, God instructs the person to make dietary changes and doing that in confidence because God instructed.

Another may try to do what you did and it wont work for them, thats why we must each have a personal relationship with God because he is not a one-size-fits all God, he is a one-size-fits-YOU - as much as your capacity is.

When all your eggs are in one basket and given to God, its wisdom for you to listen to him where you should put your individual eggs and you will be rest assured that it will be safe there.

In my opinion, We just need to listen more.

What say you? I appreciate your comments.

Have you come to an end of yourself? Have you come to a point where nothing else seems to be working out and you've tried all you could? Click to meet GRACE

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...In Our ears | What Music is good for Christians?

My question to you is what is in your ears?

[source]

Everywhere you go, every channel you switch to its in your ears. Even on my phone and on your laptop, Its all in your ears.

*Insert Limpopo tune here* #iKid
i'm taking music. Music is everywhere and its so powerful and everyone is trying to make it. #PunIntended

Takes me on a trip back to creation, God made everything and he said it was good. Now who goes about saying that there is bad or evil music?

In my opinion, there is just music that is good for you and there is music that is not good for you.

Does that make those songs evil or bad? No.

"All things are lawful for me, but all things are not expedient; all things are lawful for me, but all things edify not" 1 Corinthians 10:23

Alot of Christians will go about preaching that its a sin to listen to secular music, newsflash; Its not. As much as God cares about what goes into your heart/soul, he doesn't hold it against you.

"And fear not them which kill the body, but are not able to kill the soul. but fear him which is able to destroy both the soul and body in hell" Matt 10:28

I know this portion was talking about God but i'm sure it also applies to the acts/choices that can destroy our soul.

So, why are some songs not good for you?
Because they do not edify your soul. Songs/Music is so powerful and it holds so much influence over us. Imagine feeling down and just listening to a particular song and boom you are all smiles and butterflies.
Now that is the power of music.

Ever since i read

"And be not conformed to the world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is good and acceptable, and perfect will of God" Romans 12:2

I decided to renew my mind by what i allowed in, because i knew that what i was letting in at the time was causing more harm than good, Yes this goes beyond the songs you listen to, it also goes to what you say about yourself and what you let people pronounce over you.

"...For of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks" Luke 6:45 

Can i rock your boat alittle? Not all "gospel"songs edify your soul or glorifies God.

there are songs that edify your soul, there are songs that glorify God, there are alot of song that don't.
Just because it is under the genre "Gospel" doesn't make it automatically good for you.
So, how do you know what music is good for you? Simple

"Howbeit when he, the spirit of truth is come, he will guide you into ALL truth. for he shall not speak of himself, but whatsoever he shall hear that shall he speak; he will show you things to come" John 16:13

Let the spirit be your guide "He will guide you into ALL truth" ALL includes your playlist, God didn't bring us here to go through life on our own. We have the spirit as our guide, comfort, mentor name it, He is there.

Why not let him pick out your playlist for you?


Have you come to an end of yourself? Have you come to a point where nothing else seems to be working out and you've tried all you could? Click to meet GRACE

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Worry less, Then what?

The Bottom line is worry less bah? Got it! 

So, since this is new for me because i have always been in the business of worrying. 

What do you now do with that period you always spent occupied with worrying about stuff?

*Got suggestions for me, please use the comment box. Thanks.

How was your Monday?

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29 Things you should do this year

I read about this Here on femme Lounge around July or so and i wrote it out in my note pad and i want to share the ones i did and my observations

29. Attend a funeral. It has a way of reminding us that life in finite, and tells us we should     treasure every moment we have on earth.

Checked - I attended 2 funerals this year and i visited a friend that lost her sister and grandma within one week or two weeks. You are really reminded of how short life is and you would get the urge to just do everything before its too late. My condolences go out to those that lost a loved one this year, may God comfort you. 

28. Bath under a waterfall, climb a mountain, or drive through a game reserve. Whatever you do make sure you see nature at its best, like you have never done before.

I was supposed to go to the waterfall in Niger but... but.... i was too lazy to go on that 5hrs journey, so i could not bath under a waterfall, but next year dear tomi thats your birthday present!

27. Be the answer to someone’s prayer and a solution to someone’s problem. Guide the lost stranger, feed the poor, teach the ignorant, serve a sick person breakfast in bed, and maybe give your maid a day off

I THINK i might have been the answer to a few people's prayers this year, being in the north gave me the opportunity to help a few people, wont go into details but i am very glad i was given the opportunity, i would definitely do it over again. did you help someone this year? 

26. Do you have a favorite author, designer, actor or musician? Write a fan letter to all your favorites and send it to them. Some will get it, some never will.

see where i got the idea to write Ted dekker? well now you know, i wrote and i got a reply *doing the happy dance* i want to write another one. overkill? x_x *hums oliver twist*

25. Face your Fears. If you hate crowd then by all means go to a stadium, if you are afraid of having all eyes on you then go to sing at a karaoke bar, and if you are afraid of teddy bears, go to bed with twenty! You will discover that Fear is really what it is – False Evidence Appearing Real!

My fear? talking in front of a crowd and maybe something i've not discovered yet, but then i taught a group of people with so much confidence considering that they were either older than me or looked older than me (i'm small like that -__-) i'm not done with the crowd phobia oh, but i notice the difference + i entered a pool this year! Yaaaay! 

24. Find a reason to throw a party and invite everyone you really want to be there, it could be to celebrate your birthday, or even your break up, or just because it’s another Friday! Have fun being celebrated.

i nor throw any parry oh... i dont like throwing or attending parties - even for the rice -__- i would rather have a party for one... or two *coughs*

23. Find your passion and be involved in a cause. Donate your time, money or even blood. Volunteer with organizations working in that field and help spread the word too.

Still searching................. Know any orphanage i can volunteer? get at me. Thanks :)

22. Forgive someone. Make a deliberate decision to forgive someone that had hurt you in the past, let go of your pain and bitterness, whether the person is sober or not.

I forgave myself. i forgave myself for wanting to depriving myself of this beautiful life God gave me, I forgave myself for my failures, I forgave myself for my mistakes, i forgave myself for the hurt i've cost me. admitting it wasn't easy but it was worth it. 

21. Have a junk food day! Spend a whole day eating all the junk food you love without feeling guilty.

oh! Yessss... This was fun, i shouldnt tell you, you know that already. i Love burgers any type well except its from KFC *rme*, i love taking myself out, i'm not expensive at all, one burger and a bottle of water and the girl is good. what would you eat if you had a junk food day?

20. Keep a gratitude journal. Don’t be carried away by your never ending to do lists. Take time out to count your blessings and be grateful to life for every progress you make

I've kept a gratitude Journal actively since the 8th of August, i just list all that i'm grateful for, for the day. It just helps reflect on the day and count your blessings and you definitely be reminded of how the little things count.

19. Learn not to say yes when you what you want to say is really no. Say what you mean and mean what you say.

I TRIED to do this, but some people you just cant hurt them, for example how would you tell someone that calls you alot that his calls disturb you? knowing that he just calls to check on you. you feel me?

18. Learn something new. Salsa dance, how to make apple pie or even how to speak Spanish. Add a new knowledge to yourself and meet other people who share the same interest.

I picked up Spanish. I'm still learning sha, dont let me scatter ground here with my naija-polished Spanish *pops collar*

17. Love yourself, Love others too. Don’t hold back all you can give and be to yourself and to others. Love without fear.

This struck me so deep and i took it as a challenge, its hard but its possible and i'm learning and i constantly caution myself when my mind want to start saying "not loving" people, especially random people on the street. 

16. Listen to elderly people’s story of what life was like when they were younger; let them tell you about their regrets and victories, and what they would do differently if they have a new shot at life.

I sat next to my pastor's wife on my way to one of the burials i attended and within the short period we talked i had learnt alot from her regrets and things she said she could have done differently and ofcourse right now i would be stupid to make that type of mistake. 

I made friends with older people alot more this year, its not that i dont  have people in my age group but i just feel good around people that can talk to me honestly, without judgement and with plenty maturity.

i think older people are closer to the grave so they don't have time for nonsense, so no idle talk, when its work, its work, when its play, its play.

15. Make a collection of everything you love in a scrap book. Insert picture of your favorite actress, your favorite chocolate wrapper, a ribbon from your old sexy lingerie and even your favorite bible passage.

I did this too, it was fun cutting up old newspaper, magazines and pictures. Speaking of which, i should update the scrap book. i recommend it for any girly girl that has plenty time and needs personal in-expensive fun!

14. Make a list of all those who have touched your live positively and you will be really surprised how long the list could be. Send them a mail, a text or postcards to appreciate them.

I've done the first part of this, but why have i not gotten to sending the mails? x_x

13. Make friends with children, learn to communicate with them and understand what makes them tick. Experience what life is like in their world of possibilities.

This one was funny and hard work mhen! i asked myself again "Do you want children?" your ears would almost wear out from stories, this 10 year old girl i met recently is a talkative chai, she can talk for africe, we spent 1-2hrs together that day and she had told me about home, friends from the neighbourhood, friends from school and their silly fights. i smiled through it all, i was genuinely interested and i just wanted to got back to being a kid when all i worried about was why mummy wont let me go out to play *sigh* growing up sucks, to think that i've not even "grown" up *hot tears*

me: What do you want to be in future

random small boy: I want to be a footballer

me: why?

random small boy: Because they have plenty money and i want to drive big big cars

me: o_o 

12. Make new friends and stay in touch with old ones. Get connected with a childhood friend that you haven’t seen in a long time and visit her.

I tired my best, connected, re-connected and dis-connected from some childhood friends this year, it was nice while it lasted - again :)

11. Plant a flower or vegetable, in a garden, at your backyard or in a jar. Nurse it and watch how it changes from a seedling to a full grown plant.

Plant gini? who get time? (sorry Tobi, im not insulting your garden) Next!!

10. Put on your best clothes, have a makeup done on you and have a photo shoot. You know how you admire models in magazines and try out different poses in front of a mirror? Now go do it without inhibitions, express yourself before a camera.

I wanted to mix this abit, dress up, make-up go to a bar a meet random people, but who get liver? You? Try it for both of us. :)

9. Reflect on your greatest weakness, and your greatest strength and how they can make you a better person.

Hard but one of the best things to do, i didnt even bother with the strengths much because thinking about them may make my head over swell, so i reflected on my weakness without being hard on myself to see how i can make me a better person and i do like evaluation and make mental notes of where i'm falling short. Hard work - i know, but its worth it!

8. Re-visit your favorite childhood books, movies and music. What really made you tick when you were younger?

where are we, the yankees? that you wee be having fav childhood books or movies or music? is it just me? *Looks around* NOOOOOO... I cant possibly be the only one naa! did you have any favorite childhood anything? 

I remember now, i had one fav Tyre rim, yes RIM *rme* that i always rolled around and pet sef *smh* x_x it was a long time ago naa, dont judge a sisteh, yes the razzness started from back then. #RazzandProud dont loud it!

7. Send a message to an unknown person. Write something, put it in a bottle, close it and throw it in the ocean, hoping someone, someday will get it.

Bottle ko, bottle ni *rme*

6.Sleep under the stars. When was the last time you look at the sky and marvel at the beauty? Spend a night looking at the stars and sleep off while admiring the sky.

Sleep under the sky in nigeria? better have more than one can of baygon. I marveled at the beauty of the stars and moon every night in kontagora, that place just had a way of bringing it all to your attention. Its really beautiful but biko i cannot sleep, forgive me!

5. So what if you get lost? You will find you way again! Throw the map out and go on a drive in an area near you that you don’t know well, explore the area and figure out how it’s all connected till you find your way again.

And get kidnapped? Nahh........ I'd pass!

4. Spend a day at the beach with your loved ones. Run, swim, eat, laugh and build an elaborate sand castle.

I'm still waiting for the day this one will happen x_x

3. Spice up your sexual life. Take a break from the old routines. Try out new and daring things in your sexual life.

*Coughs* #TeamAbstain here. Thanks!

2. Take a vacation from the world. Switch off your phones, log off the internet, and spend time alone with yourself doing the things you love.

I'm so looking forward to this, i guess its more recommended to people with a busy and crazy life, and i know my life would get busy and crazy soon, then i wee now take a well deserved break, but now i have not earned any vacation.

1. Talk to God. You might not fully understand the role He plays in your life, or what He really expects from you, maybe it’s time to unravel the mystery, talk to Him and listen to Him.

Saving the best for last :D The best decision i made this year was to talk to God more, i mean talk not pray, prayer is different, i adopted the "Dear God"  style and i write them down when i can or just talk like God is sitting next to me, well technically he is :) Its fun and there is a peace that washes over you after and "offloading" it all on him! feels good!

This is really long, hope i didnt bore you out before the end, what are the things you did this year that was memorable tell me, i'm interested! Thanks.

P.S: I'm editting my next vblog. :D Soon soon.

P.P.S: My sister now blogs, Check her out Here Its a gardening blog, i'm sure you'ld like it. Thanks

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Tramped

Staring at the full length mirror watching the tears drop from the top of the fleshy arch, I feel it trickle to the bottom.
I hate you.
I now have C-cups, what happened to me beautiful B-cups?
My eyes are swollen, not from crying, all thanks to you. I can't even see those pretty legs of mine.
And my curves? I don't even want to talk about it.
You have taken my youth away. Well I gave you the power, I can only blame myself.
Right here I feel it, or do you make me pee on myself too? Or you just ready to show your face?
I don't want to know the answer to that, Let me call my sister.

I can't tell you the story of how you go here. Too sad.
Too late. You're here already.
The story of the fireworks and magic you hear happens from the first look. I didn't see it.
I look at you and all I see is one that took my youth from me.
All I see is one that made me the talk of the school.
All I see is one that got me pity stares as I walked along the street.
All I see is not you.
You are beautiful but I do not notice.
I'm busy hating you.
Tomorrow, I go to the gym.
Sure! I'ld love to take you along but I'ld drop you by the way.
* * *

Its 4:45am, the gym is by the corner, let's go on a trip first, somewhere far.
But wait! Have I said "I hate you" today?
I'm excited about this journey, let's call it a journey to my youth - Again.
You only follow me half way, I go the rest alone.
Please don't give me that look, its not going to work.
Did Jesus tell you the story of moses?
Okay! This would be similar, only I don't have a basket and there are no lakes around just gutters.

Its 5:30am.
This is half way.
Time to turn back to my youth.
You've done enough damage.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

I hear about Silver spoons and some children born with them in their mouth, does the baby come out of the woman with the spoon?
Oh! Its just an expression, I get it now.
Now that I know, if I relate it to myself I would have to ask the question " What does a spoon look like?"
You know what's even sad? Our kid is asking the same question. Not for long.
Before you start to judge me, listen to my story

* * *

Waking up from the heat staring at the clock it 2am and there is no light as usual, moving my brother's leg off mine, I stood up, tip toed over the rest and went outside for fresh air. Staring at the stars, its the only hope I have, I know there has to be an opposite of this suffering.

Gave a heavy sigh just thinking of going back into that house, Its a room apartment, I'm the first child, I'm ashamed to say how many other siblings I have, good I can still count them on my 10 fingers. What was mummy thinking having us all? Gave another sigh thinking about her, she should not have left us, she was the bread winner. There was hope. May her soul rest in peace. I stare at the stars again, I need hope.

Daddy keeps reminding me that I am now the mummy of the house and I have to start doing mummy duties.
I didn't understand the rest of the mummy duties till I felt the tap at 2am.
2am everyday for a week I did mummy duties that I couldn't wash off with a bath in the morning. He disgusted me. I disgusted me. Now, I stood up every 2am.
2am outside the house was my escape from my disgusting reality.
I started sleeping during the day and staying up all night

"You this girl you are getting fatter o" My friend said when she came to see me one evening, I told her how I've been sleeping a lot more and she laughed and teased me some more about it.

* * *

"We have to run some tests to know exactly what's wrong with you" the doctor said and I couldn't imagine bola giving me money again, she only agreed to give me this one because she saw how badly I looked covered up.
I gave a deep sigh

"I honestly don't have money for any test"
Holding the results in my hands, I knew what this meant, the doctor did not have an idea and was wondering why the tears came down, how can I explain to him that I am carrying my fathers child?
The doctor says its a rear case considering the fact that I didn't know for the first 6months, I just sat there through the rest of his talk about ant-*natal, I thank him for the tests and left.

Its 2am and the cry wakes me up, I can't do this anymore. I put my hands over his mouth to shut him up, then he stopped crying after a while and he stopped moving.
He is getting cold.
I carry him and I feel nothing, I know I don't have the money to take care of him but I didn't mean to make him cold.
Maybe I just didn't know I meant it.
I try not to panic. I stood up, wrapped him up, picked a few of my things and left.

Standing outside with my mistake in hand, I find the nearest dumpstar, dropped him and with tears rolling uncontrollably, I walked away from my mistake - Forever!

**************************************

I have been seeing a lot of pictures of dead abandoned babies recently and it honestly got to me, I kept crying to God for mercy, then I asked myself why? In the process I decided to put myself in different stories and it wasn't a pretty ride. This is just my attempt to get it from their perspective.

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Th3ee + 1ne

I woke up to the ringtone of my phone

How come I recognised it?

No one ever calls

I Picked.

The voice asked just one question

What is your story?

No one has asked me that before

With tears, I narrated

Before he hung up I asked his name

"Hope" he replied. Click. *Beep*

"Anyone who is among the living has hope - even a live dog is better off than a dead lion!" Ecc 9:4

Grabbed from behind, I knew it was going to happen someday. The day had come.

He whispered into my ears,

I can't make out the sentence.

I'm terrified.

I look over my shoulder every 5mins walking through this narrow path everyday.

Today it played out.

He whispered again, this time clearly.

"I'm fear and I take you with me today"

"Do not be afraid of them; the lord your God himself will fight for you" Deut 3:22

Staring at the mirage. It looks different from what I see.

Its the first of its kind,

Its beautiful, ever seen a beautiful mirage? No? Me neither.

This one has me in it, with my hopes and dreams.

I can't go too close, we know the story of the mirage. It disappears.

But I watch from the "safe" distance.

I smile. It is real.

He stood by me, Faith he called himself and placed the beautiful mirage in my hands.

"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see" Heb 11:1

Sitting by the roadside with my plate. My precious plate, Begging - Again.

I smell. I know. Can't afford a bath.

Everybody walks pass this little girl everyday not even a coin to spare.

Just like everyday I sit and wait. Nothing - As Usual. Then unusual happens.

He walks past me, he stopped, then walked back. He is dumb, but he spared his coin - from his plate and a smile, I couldn't miss the smile, I smiled back.

Something else I didn't miss, what he hung on his chest.

"I'm love. I don't speak. I act"

"Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth" 1John 3:18

"Now these 3 remain: Faith, Hope, Love but the greatest of all is Love" I Cor 13:13

Thanks for Stopping by

Love!

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Thoughts from within - Narrow Path?

I flipped through the pages for my bible to the passage i heard as the bible reading for the service which reads

1 John 3:7-9
Little children, let no man deceive you: he that doeth righteousness is righteous, even as he is righteous.

He that committeth sin is of the devil; for the devil sinneth from the beginning. For this purpose the Son of God was manifested, that he might destroy the works of the devil.
Whosoever is born of God doth not commit sin; for his seed remaineth in him: and he cannot sin, because he is born of God.

Did you also get the eye-opening reaction it got after reading this?

My ever over-active mind just slapped me with ''So madame you are of the devil'' as i'm trying to convince myself that 'm not i asked myself

What Can be qualified as sin gaan?
I don't steal, lie, fornicate, commit adultry, kill but ofcourse i still know i'm far from righteous.

Still having my inner sober reflection when the pastor comes up and gives the answer to my question.

Sin is disobedience of Gods word.

Okay i knew that but the question was did i know God's word?

The word in Romans 1: 29-32
Clearly states what God loathe

wickedness, evil, greed, greed, envy, murder, strife, deceit, malice, gossips, slanders, God-haters, insolent, arrogant, boastful, those that invent ways of doing evil, those that disobey their parents, senslessness, faithlessness

Also in colossians 3: 5-9
We have Anger, Rage, Malice, Slander, Filthy Language, Sexual Impurities, Lust, Evil desire, greed.

And Just like me, alot of us have forgotten that Sin isn't just about Stealing or killing there are alot more ''little'' words that we fail to obey.

I read here( joeyeparker.wordpress.com/2012/06/18/strive-for-perfection/ ) about perfection, trying to erase in our minds the notion we have that nobody can be perfect, that only makes us give up, however in as much as we are not perfect we should acknowledge our imperfect state and strive for perfection, that way we would always want to be better versions of ourselves.

Correlation you might ask..

Yes, when we stop acting all ''righteous'' and acknowledge that we are falling for little sins as unforgiveness, greed, anger etc.. Then we would be able to sit up, repent, stop being of the devil and move on to the narrow path.

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Thoughts From Within

"When other people become your source of happiness, you begin to be unhappy"

"Never let your happiness depend on things, situations and people for as history tells us, things, situations and people do and will always change"

These quotes I read off twitter started my half-thoughts (as I would like to call 'em) because I'm still don't understand.

How exactly is the right way to be happy?

The way people open up their mouth and say this is What or what not to make one happy beats me.

As children all we just needed were toys, food, time to play and parents that would be there when they need more, to be happy right? Or what other worry do they have? School? Oh please..

When we grow older our parents became uncool, started going to church because your parents wanted us to go, school stress, friend wahala different reasons to be unhappy started showing up from nowhere right?

Disclaimer: This is me just generalising, ofcourse I'm aware there would be exceptions.

I know God is the ultimate giver of happiness, but truthfully how many of us understood this growing up? So what did we do? Found the happiness with someone or things we liked or stuffs we bought right?

Either ways the "someone" & "Something" factor was there right? Although the happiness was short-lived but it was there.

Someone always says this to me

"no one can make u happy. Real happiness is from within"

My own confusion here is, even if you get "within happiness" does someone or something not have something to do with it?

And what is this "happiness from within"? What exactly does it entail?

Is there a right way to be genuinely happy??

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Dear God,

I wrote this in my journal 18th August 2010, was reading it today and wondering "did you really write that Tomilola?" Anyways see what I'm talking about.......

Dear God,

At this stage am just full of plenty decisions to make or rather plenty questions and no answer, please lord grant me your wisdom to get the answers to my question..
Lord, I don't have anyone and I know I don't need anyone except you please grant me the peace and joy I need to enjoy your presence so I wouldn't feel lonely due to lack of people to talk to...
God please forgive me my sins, help me so I would sin no more.
Thank you lord for everything you've done in my life, am grateful for the things I have and give me the grace not to complain about anything, because I know there are people in this world who would give anything just to be where I am today.....
Lord I've written all I want, how I want them. Our destiny is in our hands, so I put my hands in your hands. Grant me this wish and make my destiny come to pass and as the day go by help me make the right choices..
Help me love you the way I read that I should love you.
I ask through Jesus Christ our lord! Amen



Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless handheld from Glo Mobile.

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