DENT-ist Ordeal

Sleepin' last night was a big deal, with different horrible pictures of what the ordeal would b like + au witchy my dentist would be!

I get myself through the night, wakin' up wasnt the 'routine(d)' type, because dz day, i did not go back to sleep after devotion. I was scared to ma teeth, after hearin' ma dad's story whos was prolly born in a dental clinic, cos that place keeps callin him back mhen! He is missin' close (if not more than) 7 teeth.. Now i have the picture in my head!

I get to the hospital. Walkin in all chicky, tryin' to form vandam, like i won't cry when i see a needle. I do all the welcome-Its-Your-first-time ritual and i was lead to the dentist office.

Now lets dance...

Its a woman oh crap! Medical-Women are alwayssss wicked! Chai i haff entered it today! Dis is my first impression!
'seat let me examine your teeth' i opened up, she did her job and unceremoniously said 'i would remove the two on the left side and fill the one on the right' shit! Wait oh, you are tellin' me this news like its nothing?? I was expectin' a sober kinda thingy for cryin out loud, Its like amputation, buh yeah, rite now you are the boss! Gives me the card to get my drugs and injection, so this is d part i dreaded... 'open your skirt' Nobody told me about getting injection on ma bum naa+ au would i get an anaesthetic for ma tooth on ma bum? Now it clicked chai, am so gerrin' anoda injection in ma mouth OMG! Just the mere thought of it brings tears to my eyes.

'This would not hurt' yeah its easy for you to say since u the one GIVING!
Mhen that hurt badly, with tears rollin' down my eyes not from the injection, but from the insrtument that would be used on me, things that looked like they were brought out of a mechanical tool box... Let the fixin' begin, after a lot of shakin' and pullin' the first one comes out, Now i look at ma dad, he couldnt keep lookin' and it looks like he has tears in his eyes, am touched!.... Then the second also comes off!

Now i can't even continue re-living the moment, it feels like a nitemare! One thing i know for sure - i NEVER want to go back to a dentist, wait oh i HAVE to; on friday to get the last tooth filled - CRAP!!!

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Trip to the doc's office......phew!

Sitting at the waiting room, few minutes feels like hours, i sit 5 places away from my fate, the outcome of this 'consultation' decides my fate, my mind is anywhere but here what if.... 'No No i don't wanna think the worse!' Lemmie just be optimistic about this. It either comes out as a positive result or nothing.
I close my eyes to say a short prayer which leaves me a lil' stronger but i can't shake that voice 'So u think a short prayer would erase ur past?' i'm broken again, i tink 'maybe i do deserve whatever the result would be, i've not exaclty made my health top priority' - Now i move closer to the door that holds my fate @ the other end, the heart races at top speed. How would i explain this to the doctor shouldnt i be ashamed of my self?? Like they say 'your past always has a way of catchin up with you' i guess today is my day! So i go over the least embarrassin' 'mental speech' for the doc cos am 2 seats away OMG!! 2 seats?? Here i was tinkin' it was 5 seats, now i gotta be sure 'should i stand up and leave or should i just keep movin?' Lemmie just get this over with already jare... I move one seat closer...!

Now the moment is here, Maybe a speech is d wrong approach, lemmie just open up for him to see, am sure by then words would be of no use, lemmie just swallow my pride nd do this!

In the doc. office
With my heart racin' i find d words 'Good Morning sir'- Morning whats the problem..

Then i opened up for him to see, i Could see the disgust in his face- really for him to have that look, i knew it was even worse than i thought... Then i heard d dreaded words i did not want to hear
'You have to see a dentist'

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....In My Head!

17th Feb. '11 17:51pm

I'm Lyin' and staring at myself in the mirror, trying to write in my journal, a million and one things going through my mind...
- Skul, project stuff
- My new boyfriend
- Skul - Again!!!
- Saturday Class - where did dis one even come from? Crap!
- I need a Job - Yes a real Job
- Tryin hard not to complain
- Boredom
- Youth Service
- Tired of being the 'kitchen utensil'

*phew* my head might just burst...!

Its dawnin' on me again that am gonna be a graduate help! Am still a small girl oh! Now am asking my self 'are you ready?' honestly am not sure but all i hear is 'ready or not here i come' so i gotta brace myself for the task ahead. Now i feel violated!

Have to think of ma project and how my grades HAVE to miraculously go thru the roof before i graduate, how thats gonna happen i dont know, abeg pray for me oh!

You pray for a good man, you get one, then you are all scared, scared of wat exactly? I don't have an idea sef, buh, i guess its ok to be sometimes rite? One thing - he is the sweetest being God created. Yes oh, i am in love.

Arrgghhhh.... Skul again!!! 'let me just do this once and for all jare' this comes to my mind now i've decided to go back to skul after leavin' skul....where? God knows.

With the thought of goin' back to skul, i NEED a job or i need to do somthing that would pay me and NO! I don't need the money to buy a blackberry - Yet. I just need to ease the burden off ma parents abit. There are just three much expenses *phew* Now ma advert... I'ld work 2 jobs, do just bout any LEGAL job there is, just hook me up abeg (no kiddin')

Been home for 2 weeks (appx) and the 'tomilola' sound track is just on 'constant' repeat sometimes i just wanna put on some permanent ear plug and not dance to the tune, buh, what choice do i have since i've decided to resign the 'rebel' post?? I tot so too..! Really Good Girls are suffering #enuffSaid

Right Now i don't even know anY Longer but come to think of it what do i even know?
I'm just grateful to God that am alive and happy!

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Fw: Simply Put- Vanity

The love of money is the root of all evil 1Tim. 6:10 But in this new world/generation love for money = life.. Yeah go ahead and deny it by trying to convience yourself at the back of your mind 'i don't love money' No matter how much we try to deny it, we all have lost sight of alot of important things chasin' this paper with dead people on 'em. My sister, yesterday did not go to church cos she did not have money.. Really does it count??? She (ma mum) sat one day and thought it through carefully - what exactly do we live for?? She sat me down and analyzed it, Its not like we over-love money in that sense, its just that we have attached so much importance to 'money', we live our lives like getting money is a do or die affair, even the 'churches' of our days are also losing sight, so, i ask myself where exactly did we go wrong?? How do we fix this?? I don't have the answers to all these questions but one thing i wanna say is - we should look at our lives and see where we all have gone wrong and fix it. Ma mother would say 'Not having money would not change your name- they just won't add chief or mr.' so, lets not lose sight of the important things in life like Family, Friends, LOVE and most Importantly God! Happy Valentine's Day People....

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Sign or be signed - OUT!!!!!!!?

Do you SOLEMNLY agree to get expelled???

Normally i know you get YES/NO options to questions like this but here you only have one.......

Regular sunday evening service, if WE (my roommates and i) don't go to church, we lock the door behind, but its like the devil was really against us this particular sunday because we all slept off then we hear in the most authoRitative voice.....

''If you are in the hostel and you like yourself better find a way out''

My head rang four times before i knew what i was doin' i had pick up almost 5 clothings to wear cos i began to wonder 'chai this man would kill me after payin school fees for 4 years they wld now suspend me in final year' that was when i remembered God that i refused to go and worship, really did i even expect him to answer me? But he did.....

Luckily for me (us) our punishment was only a piece of paper buh mhen it brought a lot of weight nd i quote

'' This statement of solemn agreement is hereby signed this 17th day of january 2011 by me ..................................to undertake and comply with the following expectations to ensure my spiritual heath and guarantee my continual stay in this faith based university
1. To be in the church at 8.45 and 4.45 pm for morning and evening service on sundays respectively
2. To pray for at least 20mins after the end of every service
3. To bring my bible to service and ACTIVELY participate in congregational singing
4. Not to wear jeans skirt or trousers to church and that my dress as a lady would cover my chest and extend below my knee, and as a man my trousers would be on my waist and not below.
5. I would not make noise or converse with anyone sitting next to me in church.
I understand that i would be EXPELLED without any further warning from the university if i disobey under any circumstances, any of the five rules above''

really, shouldnt i be given an option to sign this or not?? I don't think its fair cos you are more or less signin' your expulsion letter but who cares? When they say sign you sign or be signed - OUT...

Now i have learnt, i dnt even see myself stabbin' church service till i graduate instead na to Dey go church 1hr before service time oh...

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I'm Back!!!

1.30 am

I'm lyin' here in the dark with alot on my mind... Exams are in less than 5days nd i've nt read, i don't hava an idea where to start writin' my project from, this no-light situation in school, my blog and the list goes on nd on.......

Its been a while i picked up my pen to write about anything (which is weird), even writing in my journal takes the grace of God, but gotta confess tho' i think i stopped writing in the journal because it started to feel like the journal had jinx-ed me or something..(long story)! Now i don't even know who/what to blame for that, i guess i can take the blame for a change. ;)

Its a new year and honestly i don't feel the new-ness well except the date and am graduating this year yeah!!! Yes 2010 wasn't exactly my defination of a great year but in all i'm grateful for being alive to see another year, so far the year has been Wonderful.

I'm suppose come here and drop all the drama happening in my life, well i think me being in this school is enough drama, buh where do i start from? everyday seems like a whole different story, but now am even too busy to pay attention to a lot of things, but somethings you would never be to busy to SEE is the 'skinny' craze OMG sometimes i have to bury my head in shame #enufsaid.. (i think i have to dedicate one post to ma school DRAMA)

Now i hope i get the time to keep writing, i'ld try to keep up....

Btw Happy New Year......

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Crowdford!!!!

Well constructed flower beds, this is the first attraction, then the beautiful entrance that reads 'crawford university' like they say first impression lasts longer i think the organisers or whoever put this together did a good job on that one.
Moving on the absolutly magnificent administrative block opps sori i forgot 'our' newly built relaxation ground or whatever the name is -where no one goes to relax...ok back to the admin, the beautiful interlocking pathway that leads to the brown 2 storey building to the leftand to your right our famous 'L' shaped lecture rooms and laboratories oh! I forgot it also has offices for lecturers plus its beautiful..

This is a very serene environment condusive for learning, beautiful people oh snap! Lets be realistic here jare... That is where all the goodness ends..

Now lets talk about crowdford...

Am calling it that because the population increases not just every session but every month and the infrastructure doesn't grow now thats pure greed!
This is an advanced 'secondary school'
we have time to leave the hostel of which is 9am WTF even if you don't have lectures, you have to leave the hostel please to do what? Read? Or still go to the lecture hall and everywhere is filled with students hanging around because there are not enough classes?

Now going to church is even another entirly different story. We get to church and we are even forced to kneel down and pray how old do you think we are? 5? No one really needs spoon feeding....

Food hmm...you go to buy food to eat, you probably were hungry before you get to the spot but as soon as you see what the food looks like there is an instant lose of apetite not to talk of tasting it but you just have to eat because you pity the worms you are breeding down in the tummy. The quality and quantity of food reduces everyday (well i think thats an exaggeration sha) but take for example they decided to make chicken and chips, when it kicked off people were attracted because of the size of the chicken, well one semester after its like the chicken suddenly caught aids or something and the prices of potatoes went through the roof...

Accomodation, this is the first school that i would hear have their final year students living 6 in a room but very soon now we girls would travel to 'akwa ibom' *winks* dormitory to live 12 in a room without windows...how pathetic..

Really am tired of complaining because i know no one is there to listen.
Note to the fortunate members of this community, live the moment and enjoy every bit because trust me you would miss it no matter how bad it seems now.
And to the owners and runners of the community please pity us and correct some atleast some of the wrongs we have suffered enough Thank you!

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Life without the 'R's and 'Y's

I pick up my laptop to type an article then discovered evething i wanted to tpe looked like that oh shit! the 'r' and 'y' keys don't work... I've been using my on-screen keyboard as alternative but that could be very frustrating...

This got me thinking seriously about my life without these particular letters in my words, they definatly would look meaningless now am even looking above this write up and i've used countless r's and y's....

Just like the alphabets every letter needs another letter to make sense to anybody in any language, so does everyone in this world need the next person to make the world a better place, so look at the person next to you as the 'r' and 'y' that you need to to make that wo'r'd meaningfull'y' meaningful and stop seeing people as either worthless or irrelevant to us because we never can tell where the tides of life is taking us tomorrow..

So am challenging every reader right now to be the 'r' in someone's word and also make the next person the 'y' in your lively life, am sure if we all as individuals accept this challenge this world would be a better place....

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Writer's Blocked???

This is unfair! That is all i can say about this. But why does this have to happen to every body that writes?

Writer's block is a condition, associated with writing as a profession, in which an author loses the ability to produce new work!

I'm just writing this as a way of encouraging myself because right now i have this and it sucks really cuz you wanna write so bad but you are dry (litrally)...

Since i dont i've inspiration to write i decided to use my disappointment as a blessing...

Thinking hard am gonna likin the 'blocked life of a writer' to life itself.
In life we all have the highs and lows. I've not been on this earth long but i've been long enough to know that there are some times when you get extremely happy, that you might even kiss your dog and other times you are just emmm....i won't say 'sad' lemmi say 'extra low' that you don't even feel like getting out of bed to even take a bath, at this point in my life i dont even feel like getting out of bed.

The question now is what do you do those times? Honestly i was still trying to figure it out the answer a few minutes before i picked up the courage to put something down in my book...

When i picked up my pen to write i had no idea what to write about and i tink someone to me 'make the best out of whatever situation you find yourself' either its when you feel like kissing your dog or when you feel like staying under the covers, make the best of it, use it to your advantage and trust me you will feel so so good about it cos right now i feel good that i turned my BLOCKED situation to emmm....(i dont v the word o) i guess UNBLOCKED!

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Day 18: Someone i wish i could be

MTN has really bin dulling me!! Am sori for the zillionth time....

Well there is no one i wish i could be like because this is MY story and as the day go by i am writing my own fairy tale, i really hope people would stop re-living other people's lives and start writing theirs...Its not too late you know!

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Day 19: My view on gay marriage

What is gay Marriage?? This is the union between two individuals of the same sex in 'UNHOLY' matrimony...

Am gonna try not to get too spiritual here but there is no way we talk bout this and not refer to God's Commandment...

Some people say 'whats wrong with being attracted to people of the same sex' well here is your answer EVERYTHING!!!!

Lately i've had like 2 people tell me being a lesbian is cool but its gross being gay WTF abeg wats d difference??

This is absolulty wrong in all ramification Biblically, Morally, Physically gosh it even violates d law of magnetism ''unlike poles a attract and like poles repel'' am guessn this gay people did not pay attention in introductory technology class...

What make people 'turn' gay??
Yeah i said turn because am so sure God did not creat anyone gay...
i did not make any research before i wrote this bcos there should not be any justification for this ridiculous and shameful act

God commanded ''be fruitful and multiply'' and last i checked or rather anytime i would eva check guys dont impregnate guys so wats gonna happen to fruitfulness and multiplication?? If i hear u say adopt there you suppose chop slap!

I Hear some non-gay people say 'there is nufin bad about it, they are human and they are free to express their feeling' common shattap jor why can't you do it too?
One thing i want to tell anyone who knows a gay or lesbian is to do the person a HUGE favour and take the person to the nearest MOUNTAIN OF FIRE AND MIRACLES MINISTRY bcos all that person needs is some good old fashioned deliverance...

So marriage??? Thats the height of insanity...
I'm not judging the people that find themselves in this situation but i just suggest you get in touch with your soul, talk to your body, talk to a christian shrink and change your sexual orientation...enough said! I pray God helps us all...

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day 17: Someone from my Childhood

Warning: This is probably gonna be the driest post ever cos where i am right now i did not get internet connection to use my phone to update all morning......

Honestly i don't have anything to write because today was not exactly a good day for me *too long story* you dont wanna know trust me... anyways i'm just updating nnow because i don't want to fail in my challenge, so am gonna highlight what i've bin doin lately/ what i've bin goin through

1. Trip to Ife...Trust me i needed it...
2. Got a new ASST. Boyfriend *don't ask*....i like him (if u r ma friend and u r intrested in knwin ask me...lol)
3. IT report.. its harder than au it sounds trust moi
4. Thinking hard about taking my writing seriously...It sounds like a really good idea, i've spoken to a couple   of pple
5. I saw a couple of old friends....gosh that felt so good..if i saw u this week..mmuuaaahhhh
6. I saw my 'FRIEND....It was so good to see you after wat seemed like forever..
7. Right now am chatting wif ma nu asst. bf and am feeling all mushy...bite me!
8. I Love myself and YOU
9. truthfully i dont actually have anything else to write....

Remember i warned you it waas gonna be boring so please don't blame me, lets Blame PMS today.....

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Day 16: someone in Not in my state or Country/ Are promises really made to be broken???

So in my quest of makin this challenge intersting to read am changin todays topic....
Really why now? I ask myself but on a second thought why not! Let us just deal with this and move on with our lives as better and changed people don't you think?
Am so sure everybody at one point or another has had a promise broken..well like i always do i speak for myself.
I've had everyone in my life make a promise to me at some point and still break it on my head..ouchh!
Really why do people break promises, well i think its just bcos they dont know the defination of the word promise so am gonna help you, the dictionary meaning of promise is:
''-a sign of future success
-to say or give one's word
-to say or give one's assurance that one will or will not do something.''
When you say things like
'i will call you, i'll call you tomorrow, i'ld clean the mess up, i will always make you happy, i will always love you, i will love you for the rest of my life'
Well NEWS FLASH those are not just mere words they are PROMISES and they are not made to be broken...
what are the effects of breaking promises??
The one and most important effect is you the breaker would not be trustworthy and the breakee would be unhappy and would find it hard to trust people
I won't act all innocent like am not guilty of breaking promises i am! In short everyone is guilty, and am putting this as a reminder to remind myself that i have to remember not to break promises anymore because its improtant we all know the significance of the things that come out of our mouth and if that promise has mistakenly slipped out please endevour to follow it through and if you know you can't 'DONT SAY THE WORD'

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Day 15: The person i miss the most

Today i'm half way through my challenge. I became lazy to update so i say ''Devil is a liar''... Well the truth be told i have been working on my IT report all day and its really not easy trust me...

So who did i miss the most actually i dont have a specific someone cos all day i have been searching my brain but all i know is that i miss all my bestfriends soo much i would love to hang out with them anytime soon...i love you guyz...

oK! am sensing that this thingy is getting boring so i would try my best to make it more interesting after....



P.S: I am trying to take my writing thing more seriously so i spoke to a few people today and am thinkin if things work out well by the grace of God you will be seeing my articles in places other than my blog hehehe....

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Day 14: Someone from whom i've Drifted

Gosh i totally forgot i had to do this....

Ok! So who have i drifted from??? emm... Yeah my Laptop gosh i've so missed ma baby altho' she doesnt have a name but she is my baby, since i left school for my internship i've abandoned her and am sure she felt it... So baby this is my public apology to you since we still have a long way to go together, you would be with me through IT report, my lonely days, project proposal, project et all...and am sure you would not 'baje' on me...love you boo boo and i've missed ya loads...

Ps: i've really bin having alot of typos in ma posts lately i am sori and to y'all dt told me much love mhen....now i promise to proof read before i post....thanks...

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